How To Deal With Your In-Laws
“Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” – Romans 12:16-18
If you are planning to get married or have been married already — your spouse’s family has become your family too. Not everyone is lucky to have the best and supporting in-laws, some of them may interfere with your marriage or simply difficult to be with. However, getting along with your in-laws plays a vital role to keep your marriage healthy and alive. So, take an effort to build a great relationship with your in-laws and make your spouse fall in love with you all over again.
Here are some Christian ways on how to deal with your in-laws.
Keep in mind that they are your spouse’s family.
“With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, 3 eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” – Ephesians 4:2-3
Don’t treat your in-laws as an opponent in your spouse’s life. Instead, treat them as your own family and love them the way you want to be loved. “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” – Matthew 7:12. Love them unconditionally and don’t make them feel that they are taken for granted. “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” – John 13:34-35
Build a personal relationship with them.
“May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus.” – Romans 15:5
Have a healthy relationship with your mother-in-law and other in-laws — invite them in your home, welcome them with a smile, cook their favorite dishes, engage in a deep conversation with them, make an effort to know them well and make them absolutely love you. “Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.” – Romans 12:10. Know your in-laws’ interest and spend quality time with them. You can cook, do chores together or simply watch movies in your home. Extend your help to them as much as you can and show your affection to them. Thus, you can also engage in an activity that will ignite your faith such as Bible journaling for Women, scrapbooking or coloring Bible. “How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!” – Psalm 133:1
Show your respect.
“Honor your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you.” – Exodus 20:12
Respect is very important in every relationship, so honor your in-laws and always be polite with them. Don’t curse and keep your tone down even when you are having an argument with them. “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” – Ephesians 4:29. Keep the unity and peace between you and your in-laws. Listen to their unsolicited advice, understand where they are coming from and control your temper if you have an argument or misunderstanding. “Every one of you shall revere his mother and his father, and you shall keep my Sabbaths: I am the Lord your God.” – Leviticus 19:3
Be grateful for them.
“Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving.” – Ephesians 5:4
Without your in-laws, your spouse couldn’t have been born in this world, so take a step to express your gratitude to your in-laws. “May your father and mother rejoice; may she who gave you birth be joyful!” – Proverbs 23:25. Send cards or notes to them expressing how grateful you are to have them in your life or tell your kids to make DIY cards for them. Treat them to a sumptuous meal with the family, stroll in the mall, have a game night at home or simply spend quality time with them. Make them feel loved, special and important in every occasion, and greet them on their Birthdays and other holidays. “May the Lord be loyal to you in return and reward you with his unfailing love! And I, too, will reward you for what you have done.” – 2 Samuel 2:6
Include them in your prayers.
“And when Jesus entered Peter’s house, he saw his mother-in-law lying sick with a fever. He touched her hand, and the fever left her, and she rose and began to serve him.” – Matthew 8:14-15
Prayer is one of the most precious things that you can give to someone. So, include your in-laws in your prayers and ask God for their health, happiness and protection. Thank God for giving you a second family that you can call your own. “We give thanks to God always for all of you, constantly mentioning you in our prayers.” – 1 Thessalonians 1:2.
Lastly, if your in-laws are unbelievers, ask God to use you as an instrument to plant the seeds in their hearts. “The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace.” – Numbers 6:24-26. Share the gospel to them, be a living testimony and make the love of God shine through your action towards them. “In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” – Matthew 5:16